Friday, 30 January 2009

Lumbering political behemoth in economic china shop

I've never tried live blogging before, but us girls are good at multi-tasking so here goes. To be honest not I'm going to pick over the minute detail of Gordon's speech in Davos - I am way too superficial for that.

As I watch Gordon and Mr Moon sit side by side at their press conference I am reminded of two schoolboys facing a disciplinary for losing all the tuck shop money. Monster-rabbit-caught-in-headlight-panic mumbling incoherence is the order of the day. Oh I see Gordon forgot to mention his two main achievements, he is obviously a bit nervous, poor soul. I'd better call his mobile to remind him to mention "no more boom and bust" and "saved the world", I think that might sway those cynical journalists waiting for the Q&A. No answer - you'd think he would be polite enough to take a call from a fellow ex Edinburgh student, but to no avail, i'll try once more - no joy, he screened me again, sigh...

I see he's not got to grips with his new Nokia mobile phone, it's still on the default ringtone - why would anybody trust a global world leader who can't even change the ringtone on his mobile phone? Even my 67 year old father spent 20 minutes customising the tone on his new phone, despite the fact he is stone deaf, and never switches his phone on unless he needs it. 

Oops off on a tangent there

So in summary, everybody should mimic the UK; continue to spend every penny propping up their failed economy, print more money, borrow and spend. Press conference over.

Oh good, they've got a real expert on now, but alas Richard Branson appears to have nothing worthwhile to say either - other than bum up his Virgin brand. I can see a trend here, time to stop.

What a waste of 30 minutes, I've got to sign on today - guess I should go dig out my can of Stella Artois and flammable sports gear. Thanks Gordon I'll sleep better tonight knowing that you are looking after my future economic prosperity - there are oh so many new ideas bursting forth from your little bonce aren't there?

EDIT: I'm not one for telling jokes, but just heard this one on BBC News 24:
What's the difference between Ireland and Iceland?
One letter and 6 months

Looking good for Ireland, the 'Celtic Tiger', then...


  1. What's the difference between the UK and Albania?

    Not much.

    Hey Clara - I think we're fucked.