Saturday, 17 October 2009

Solipsism

It's Saturday evening and I'm hacked off, nobody is coming out to play - but I have a plan:

Ingredients:
2 x bottles of Lake Tehua Sauvignon Blanc
1 x v. expensive meal from the best Chinese in Edinburgh
6000ish x MP3s on random and played at about 11 on the volume control
1 x hair dye

Method:
Mix all ingredients together, dance around sitting room for about 45 minutes, rinse hair.  Eat Chinese meal. Dance some more. After 4 hours ignore neighbours knocking on door, point speakers out of windows and sing.  When police arrive inquire why they have no real criminals to chase, tell them that you have stockings that are older than them and inquire if the police service now have a positive discrimination policy on the recruitment of dwarfs. Accept ASBO and go to bed, with music still playing, just slightly quieter. Frame ASBO on wall following day.

Wish me luck.

Edit: spotted this picture advert at the wonderful TractorStats place, it made me laugh, I guess there is always someone worse off than yourself - have a good Saturday evening...


3 comments:

  1. Hi Polaris
    Glad you're sounding chirpier. Where do you get your Chinese from? I've not had a decent one since Joannas shut down.

    My man is making home made truffle ravioli, stuffed with Mozarella & leek, with a tomato & chilli sauce and basil cream. Sadly I'm drinking cheapo boxed wine. Mmmm just got to taste the basil cream yum.

    Have a blast

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  2. Hi BJ, thanks for your comment - finally feeling a bit better, antibioticy tummy notwithstanding.

    Now I need a man that can cook - the ravioli sounds yummy. If mine was to do ravioli, it would be an unopened tin put in the microwave, exciting but hard to eat off the wall.

    Well the hair dye is in and Wolfmother and the Who are serenading my neighbours. I've ordered from the confusingly entitled No.1 Chinese, on Elm Row - big portions, crispy Wun Tuns and spicy Chicken Wings.

    Enjoy your vino & Italian.

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  3. Saturday night in Leith - ach. Gled tae hear yer feelin better.

    ReplyDelete