Friday, 29 January 2010

Watch out there are bloggers about...

On my return from a head-clearing wander around Leith on Monday morning, the only weekday time when you can be sure of a hassle free amble, I was passed by a panda car leaving the cul-de-sac.

When a police car appears in my quiet corner of Leith it is usually of some significance; the last time the boys in blue were in the locale, some time ago, it was at the behest of my neighbour who had his motorcycle hoisted into the back of a panel van in the early hours and whisked off; to wherever stolen motorcycles are taken to be given a new identity or broken up.  The subsequent statement taking and promises of a thorough enquiry resulting in nothing more than a risible insurance payout and a hike in his insurance premiums that rendered future bike ownership an unaffordable dream - 6 months on he has no bike and the joys of public transport to console him.

Back to Monday's panda car departure - Imagine my surprise when I found a little yellow note, an 'MP19' Police Message, with a business card attached, pushed through my letterbox.  On scrutiny it appeared that a Sergeant would like me to help him with an 'Enquiry'; two wrongly routed telephone calls through the astonishingly incompetent police call centre later I eventually managed to make contact with the elusive Sergeant via email.

The reason for his visit?

A blogger, based locally, had complained repeatedly to the police about me - alleging that I had embarked on some kind of campaign, threatened him and that I was involved in a sophisticated high level viral marketing campaign backed by the, I feel ill just typing it, Scottish Labour party.

Stunned and more than a little angry just about comes close to my reaction...

So to round this up, just a couple of points Herr Bloggermeckern
  • I don't just blog I have a life, offline so to speak - you should try it, it's big out there
  • I am an anarchist, maybe a lefty minarchist - I don't know if that is possible, and do not care
  • I have no connection with any organised political party, I may have had in the past, not now - you cannot organise anarchists any more than you can atheists or cats for that matter
  • I despise what the Labour party has become, it is now the very epitome of lowest common denominator, freedom hating pseudo liberal fascism
  • I mistrust all politicians
  • I reserve the right, here on this blog, my blog, to express my opinions - if you don't like them you can fuck off elsewhere, there are interweb sites for everything and everybody - try Google, it's a search engine
  • If you are dyslexic and not just stupid as I suspect, use a spellchecker and stop bleating about it - it means the square root of nothing to me; I have trouble with complex numbers but I don't feel the need to broadcast it
  • Don't use a sexual pen name and expect to be taken seriously
  • If you are so fragile and as easily upset as you obviously are I can recommend arts & crafts in preference to blogging; macramé a straight-jacket or perhaps you could needlepoint a coherent blog post with a well constructed argument - there is a first time for everything
  • You cannot make up laws in your jumbled mind and then report them to real world law enforcement, it doesn't work like that - it's a waste of time for everybody
  • I know you regularly visit my blog, if you wish to engage in a conversation please email me - I'd love hear from you...
That is all, bloody bloggers hmmph


  1. Is it all sorted then? With Dibble, I mean.

    The world is full of morons, and I am sorry that you were latched onto by one of them.

    Time will deal with him.


  2. Suspect cops just covering their arse following a tinfoil hat complaint. Most of them probably have their own blogs anyway, to vent steam about their employers and "clients"!

  3. Bloggers, what are they like WR? It seems to be open season on bloggers at the moment which attracts the nutjobs out there.

  4. Alright! alright! point taken i wont complain to the polis anymore....

    Word Verification


    a Omen?

  5. That you have problems with complex numbers, Polaris, means the square-root of minus nothing to me.

  6. "You cannot make up laws in your jumbled mind and then report them to real world law enforcement, it doesn't work like that..."

    Except, it would appear that not only can he do that, it really does work!

    Luckily, in your case, the police didn't invite you to delete your blog...

  7. Hi all, thanks for your comments - decided to start blogging again and ignore this debacle.

    I don't know if it's over, will find out soon enough, moreover I intend to fight it all the way, should it escalate.

    Touche Edgar - that's my problem, divide by zero error, as for minus 1 - frazzle frazzle...

    Julia - the police were struggling to tell me why they were forced to follow this up, but they felt they should???? Incredible link - I trust the suggestion to delete will be treated with the contempt it deserves.